Ode to Creativity and Madness

 

The Worrell Gallery

After a week in beautiful Santa Fe at the Creativity and Madness Conference, I am renewed in my commitment to promote mental health/ wellness, and fight the stigma of mental illness.

I am also refreshed.  It is an inspiring place and an incredible conference. I wish you could've come with me, but maybe this month we can virtually travel together.

Take a deep breath and smell the fresh sage, the mountain air.

What do composer Sergei Rachmaninoff, artist Frida Kahlo, native american leader Crazy Horse, and entrepeneur Steve Jobs all have in common? Each were creative, outstanding in their life work, and had a diagnosible mental illness. 

Out of the all of the artistis that we studied this past week, only one- Rachmaninoff- sought treatment for symptoms of mental illness. His treatment was brief and successful in removing his writer's block, but social stigma discouraged him from continuing his therapy once his creativity returned.  Racmaninoff''s depression was debilitating. 

Our society has come a long way in the effectiveness of treatment and recognizing the value of intervention, but we have a long way to go. 

Historically, learning disabilities were considered a sign of ignorance and certain students were deemed"unteachable." Traditionally unsuccessful students Albert Einstein and Thomas Edison to name a few, inspired attention and research to assist unconventional learners.  Looking at the least restrictive environment model, many gifted, learning disabled, and gifted/LD students are now thriving with modified styles of teaching. 

This conference reminds me of the greatness that is possible within unconventional thinkers, who have needs that are often ignored. 

This month I will share insight and information from the conference. I hope you will share my enthusiasm for creativity, wellness, and appreciation of mental illness as a diversity in our culture.

How to Win at Losing (Part 1)

In 2013 "The Biggest Loser" television show has committed to raise awareness about childhood obesity.  According to the Center for Disease Control more than one third of all adults 17% (12.5 million!) children aged 2-19 are obese in the United States. This statistic does not include overweight children and teens. In fact, physicians are raising the concern that this generation of young people may be outlived by their parents.  If you have never watched "The Biggest Loser" in the past, consider watching at least one episode this season. In addition to the typical antics of making adult contestants do unusual challenges to win a grand prize, they have included three overweight children and their families participating from home to become healthier.

So what does it take to "win" at losing weight?
If you've ever tried to lose weight you know the answer is complicatedly simple: eat less, move more.

Part One:  Changing your food lifestyle

According to 30 years of research, psychologist Dr. Leonard Epstein has concluded "it all starts with the family." Rather than focusing on what NOT to eat, the best interventions are educational and involve life style change.  In other words.  Kids don't do diets.  If you look closely at the research on adult obesity.  Parents don't do diets well either.

Lifestyle change involves an important shift away from "diet" mentality and embracing the concept of thinking "healthy."  Some healthy habits to start (or continue):

1. Parents need to educate themselves on good nutrition. Do a thorough google search to find a website where the information is delivered in a way that you can digest (ha!). Consider joining weight watchers or seeing a nutritionist if you or your family have special needs or if you prefer face to face information. 
2. It takes time to create a good refrigerator stocked with easy access to cut vegetables and fresh fruits.  But when it comes to kids: if you prepare it they will eat!  Okay, maybe not the first time . . .  or so.  Just don't give up!
3. Clear the clutter: Remove the alternative high sugar, high calorie foods.  Will your child be eager to eat over at their friends house for awhile?  Absolutely.  But ultimately your household will have more influence on your child's eating habits over the long term.
4. Remember you can't call something a "treat" if you eat it every day.  Reverse the pattern of what is eaten as a habit, and "treat" your family once in awhile with a special dessert.

The challenge in my weight watcher 360 meeting last week was to do a refrigerator make-over. We took before pictures to increase our awareness of what we were facing each time we opened the door.  Then we were encouraged to invest in some clear containers and "have fun" preparing fresh fruits and vegetables that would be easy access and pleasing to view when it was time to search for a snack.  Here is my before and after:

The carrots were always there- who knew?

Do you want to start winning at losing?
Commit to one small shift in your food lifestyle, either in thoughts or deeds, and share in the comments!

Are morning melt-downs spoiling your mood?

The alarm rings by your bed and it is Monday, the beginning of a new school week.  Your mission is to motivate/encourage another human being into student mode—and you have a deadline.  The next bell is the sound of school starting.  What you do between those two alarms makes a big impact on yout mood in car pool and possibly the rest of the day for both you and your child. 
 
Learning the language of feelings improves the emotional climate of our family.  When our children are little we do not hesitate to label things for them.  People, food, pets, animals at the zoo.  The purpose of this naming game is to help communication; it is a sharing between parent and child.  If our children only have four words (happy, mad, sad, scared) to describe their emotional experience we are limiting the value and range of emotions in our family.

Increased self-awareness on the feelings part of parenting requires you to identify, acknowledge, and manage your own emotions so you can be more effective in teaching those skills to your child. It directions your attention on the how to get ready for school. Reality check -early morning leadership is a stretch for non-morning people, big and small.

Going back to our morning "sprint," what emotions are you and your child managing?  Here is my guess: Tired, reluctant, anxious, and frustrated to name a few.  Notice happy, cheerful, excited isn't included in my list.  It is stressful to think of the gap between how parents want mornings to feel and the likelihood of those emotions occuring spontaneously. Hence the meltdowns. 

When you acknowledge the feelings you and your child are experiencing, each of you can better prepare a strategy for making mornings FEEL better.

As a grown up what soothes you into wakefulness?  Is it lingering over coffee? Watching the news?  Reading a meditation? Take some time to reflect on the mornings where YOU were less likely to melt down.  Put some healthy ritual into your wake up.  It may require waking up earlier and getting ready before you get your kiddo moving.  This will increase the odds that you will be centered in your morning leadership.

How long does it actually take your child to get ready for school, if left to their own devices? Time it on the weekend. Consider extending your morning to decrease the "rush your guts out" experience. If this is an unreasonable amount of time here are some strategies parents have used to assist in time management: 

• Picking out clothes at night.
• Sleeping in their clothes (not kidding, it has been done)
• Storing back pack and shoes by the door.
• Having a list of morning to dos in the bathroom.

To decrease power struggles you may need to develop rules for keeping kids on track.  Successful examples are no television in the morning and stating a specific time of departure (our car leaves at 8:00).  In the early days our family enjoyed music in the mornings, kid's pick.  Tunes kept the pace rolling and provided a sense of time passing.  On our best mornings there was a sing along (it was rare but memorable)!

Do school mornings always have to mean a melt-down? No, but as a parent you will do well to adjust your goal to be more zen and less Mario Andretti.

What strategies are working in your mornings?