Feathering An Empty Nest

When both of my daughters left for school this year, I went into a career crisis. I should clarify which career was in crisis- my parenting career.  In  twenty years of private practice I have always been a dual career person, juggling all things home and all things work on a daily basis.

I felt stressed, stumped, and uncertain.

 But I wanted to celebrate their independence! This is after all the point of parenting isn't it?  To launch them into their own unique selves, to watch them grow ultimately into their own person-hood?

What about me? I whined (in my head)
What should I do now?

When I spoke out loud about it, everyone had an opinion and often a board position.  This much I know, my empty nest was not yearning for a board position. I tend to volunteer for everything and dread the meetings.

So after some very pitiful thrashing about and moping in a beloved robe I started reading.

I read incredible books like:

Daring Greatly by Brene Brown
The Right to Write by Brenda Ueland
Born Standing Up by Steve Martin (!)
The Icarus Deception by Seth Godin

I also went to class.  Not a long term semester long commitment, a mini course on blogging.  You faithful readers may not have detected change in my blogging-yet- there has been much behind the scenes work and change is coming.  In class I have met some inspiring, talented women bloggers and at home I have spent countless hours doing homework that should take fifteen minutes.(LOVING IT!)

Steven Covey describes a paradigm shift with this metaphor:  You are driving around Dallas hopelessly lost even though you have a map.  You suddenly realize that your map is of Chicago.

My paradigm has officially shifted.  My ache was not to fill my time with more doing- at this developmental stage it is all about the being. I find myself  not filling the nest, but instead feathering the nest with all things creative, more time to moodle, connect, doodle, and write.

It's all good.