Mindfulness Moments: Awaken to Beauty

I can awaken to the beauty that is all around me.

Lucky New Year's Dip

Some call it superstition, I like to think of it as southern tradition- no matter how you look at "luck" it's time to mix up a bowl of black eyed peas.

This year my recipe is a combination of two Pinterest recipes- h/t to Creme De La Crumb and Spicy Southern Kitchen.  I am calling mine Lucky New Year's Dip

Lucky New Year's Dip

2 cans black eyed peas, rinsed and drained
1 can black beans, rinsed and drained
1 can dark red kidney beans, rinsed and drained
1 can yellow corn, drained
8 sweet bell peppers, seeded and chopped (I used the red and orange for color)
One bunch of green onions, chopped
1 can of green chilies
1/2 Cup of fresh cilantro, cut with kitchen shears
1/2 Cup of red wine vinegar
2 teaspoons sugar
1/2 teaspoon ground black pepper
1/4 cup vegetable oil

Lime optional for serving

In a large bowl mix together: Beans, corn, peppers, onions, and chilies.  Add fresh cilantro.

Prepare dressing of vinegar, sugar,black pepper, and vegetable oil in a small bowl. Pour dressing into large bowl and toss to coat mixture evenly.  Cover and place in refrigerator for several hours for best flavor.Squeeze lime wedges for added kick before serving

I plan to serve our Lucky New Year's Dip tomorrow with chips to boost our chances for the Sooner's football game.

Share some luck with neighbors too!

Wishing you a safe, lucky, and very Happy New Year! LLM

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Monday Mindfulness: Respecting Grief

h/t Creativity and Madness Facebook

Grieving is the natural emotional expression following the loss of our loved ones. As we prepare for Thanksgiving and Christmas it is important to find healthy ways to express the sadness about the empty chairs at our tables.

Dia de los Muertos is a remembrance celebration with origins in Mexico.  Family and friends gather to bake special foods and create ofrendas (memory table altars) to honor their deceased.

This week make an intention to honor your grief. Consider memory sharing, sorting through photos, prayers, charitable donations in their name, or a cemetery visit.

This week I will respect my grief.

Mindfulness Monday: Calming the Stressed Brain

  

 "The greatest weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over another." William James

A stressed brain is flooded with thoughts that justify the negative emotion. We are triggered by something outside of ourselves and gather evidence to react. Our mind becomes flooded with internal defensiveness. Mindfulness is the process of quieting the mind so we have more awareness of our thoughts and feelings.Step back from your stressed thinking so can choose your thoughts.

This week I will choose my thoughts with a calm mind.

Stress Busting in the Transition Teen Years

Last month I had the opportunity to talk to parents of 5th through 9^th grade students about stress. The transition to middle school and high school is filled with anticipatory anxiety for students and their parents. 

Each parent participant received a handout, a rubber band, and a candy bar.

There are multiple external stressors that we can predict in the transition years: The impact of puberty, dating-driving-fitting in, and juggling multiple teachers and deadlines. With all of this going on outside, how each student perceives the changes/challenges is the measure of internal stress.

My message to parents: Lean in, listen more than you speak, and model/teach good coping skills.  All too often parents confuse removing stress with reducing stress.  Many fall into the trap of rescuing their child from external stress like the “mean teacher, or the “unfair loss” instead of seeing the opportunity to help build stress busting skills. It is easy to overlook the internal sources of stress.

The key to thriving (at any age) is learning how to manage the effects of stress.The handout was for parents to take notes or doodle if necessary.

Top External Stress for Teens: 

School and balancing their schedule

In the 2014 Stress in America survey our teenagers were reporting experiencing stress at higher rates than adults.  Despite feeling more stressed, these same respondents were unaware of the effects of chronic untreated stress and expressed poor confidence in their ability to manage their stress.  

Top stress buster of choice: 

Distraction

Of the many ways to manage stress distraction is the LEAST effective way to reduce the feelings and negative effects of stress. They may look relaxed, but avoidance is ramping up the pressure inside.  

  

The rubber band was to remind parents that stress is not all bad.  It is healthy for kids to learn how to stretch and to find their sweet spot in how much stress is "just right," students also need help in learning how to return to a resting state (recovery). 

A good stretch is learning how to access motivation, manage difficult people, speak up when your friends are mean, try something new.  Parents can help encourage good stretches, monitor when the stretch goes too far, and connect kids with healthy alternatives beyond distraction to manage stress.

Alternative Stress Busting Options:

1. Exercise: Take a walk, bring them to the gym, train for a fun run, work in the yard.
2. Nature: Go to the park, take a hike, read outside.
3. Sleep: Naps should be restricted to 20-25 minutes. Regular bedtimes and wake times encouraged. Recommendation is 8 to 10 hours each night.
4. Positive Friendships: A few "high maintenance" friends is fun, too many is adding to stress load. 
5. Hobbies: Not every sport or instrument is a source of college scholarship. Help your teen to try things for sheer enjoyment.
6. Music: How about a playlist for AP World studying? Engage with your student in discovering the connection between music and mood.

This is a sampling of the many possible stress busting activities that assist parent and teen in managing stress through the transition years.  So what is the significance of the candy bar?  I wanted parents to lighten up and recognize the sweet parts of raising their kids through the teen years.

Also I generally think that chocolate is a nice idea when talking about stress. 

If you know someone with a teen in transition that would benefit from this post, please share the link! 

Stress Busting with Oatmeal Scotchies and Project STIR

I bake when life gets stressful. My family can usually tell when I’m under more stress than usual because there are cookies in the house.  Lots of cookies.  

There is a zen to baking: quietly collecting the ingredients, the steady purr of my prized Kitchen maid mixer, and naturally the smell of comfort food. Baking melts my stressful thoughts and unwinds the knots in my shoulders. Cookie making soothes me from start to finish.

My love of baking was a legacy gift from my Grammie.  Grammie brought kindness, comfort, and cookies to many folks over the years.  I remember watching her bake in her tiny Texas kitchen and “helping” by tasting cookies fresh out of the oven to tell her if they were good (they always were).

Memories of Grammie are an essential ingredient to my stress reduction in the kitchen.

My blogger buddy Sarah Shotts is on a mission to rekindle family recipes through Project STIR. Sarah is a young person with a wise soul and a creative eye We met at the Arkansas Blogger Conference and connected through our mutual appreciation of the family/food connection.  Project STIR is a series of documentary films capturing the universal language of love in the family kitchen. The films will take place in kitchens around the world and will tell the stories of Abuelitas, Nans & Mothers passing on their heirloom recipes to the next generation. I am one of Sarah's “Project Stir Ambassadors” promoting the project through social media.  I was eager to participate because of my support of family time, comfort food, and creativity.

In my warming Oklahoma kitchen Grammie and I still connect over her hand written baking recipes even though she passed away many years ago.  My stress busting in the kitchen this week is creating Grammie’s Oatmeal Scotchies – aka “Scotchies.” My family loves this recipe because it is sweet and savory.  Perfect for a fall day. The insider giggle is that I looked all over for this recipe and delighted to find it in her spiral notebook, only later to learn that she copied it from the Nestle Toll House Butterscotch Morsels bag!

Grammie's Oatmeal Scotchies

1 Cup Flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon

1 Cup softened butter
3/4 Cup Sugar
3/4 Cup Brown Sugar
2 Eggs
1 teaspoon Vanilla

3 Cups Quick Oats (we like Quaker)
12 oz package of Nestle Tollhouse Butterscotch morsels (!)

Preheat Oven to 375 degrees

In small bowl mix together flour, baking soda, salt, and cinnamon- set aside. In large bowl beat brown and white sugars, eggs, and vanilla "until fluffy." Gradually add in flour mix from small bowl.Stir in oatmeal and morsels by hand.  Drop by rounded spoonful of dough onto greased cookie sheet.Bake for 7-8 minutes. 

Yum. 

This month my blog focus is on managing stress.From process to product baking has potential for reducing stress for you with the added bonus of creating opportunities to share the love and comfort (cookies) with others.  I hope this inspires you to explore creative ways to cope with stress in your life.  For more information about Project STIR please click on the link you will be treated to a morsel of Sarah's talent for videography and I promise you will feel the love. If you share Sarah’s passion for rekindling family recipes please support her mission with a donation or by spreading the word (word of mouth, Facebook shares, etc. . . .)  

Caring is sharing- how about a cookie?  

Mindfulness Mondays: Positive Stress

First lesson in Fire 101/ September 2015

                                 "I'm stressed."

"That was stressful."

"You are stressing me out!"

Stress gets a bad rap- which is understandable because we usually only think about the "too much" of stress also known as distress.  This week I want to bring our attention to it's little sister, eustress. 

Eustress is positive stress, pressure we put on ourselves to go beyond our comfort zone.  When we set goals, learn new skills, or encourage ourselves to try something different we are using the motivational power of stress to go beyond what is familiar.  We are bringing about change.

This weekend I asked Sweetness for lessons in fire starting. Cooler weather is rumored to be coming to Oklahoma and there will be nights when Sal is out of town and I will want a cozy blaze in the Chimenea.  I put pressure on myself to be a learner, ask questions, make mistakes, and ultimately to do something new.  The side effect of positive stress is a feeling of accomplishment, a sense of pride. 

 Now that lights my fire!

I will create change for myself this week.

Mindfulness Mondays: The "To Be" list

Santa Fe Snail 2015

Summer is winding down and the "Back to School" rush is beginning- don't give in to the hype.

The more comfortable I become in my mindfulness practice the more aware I am of the trap of hurrying. An adrenaline induced pace gives the illusion of completing more things on the internal "to do" list. But are they the MOST important?  

Be a rebel, resist the push to do more.  This week try "to be" more.  Make some memories with the summertime you have left. Enjoy the moment.

This week I will work on my "to be" list.

Mindfulness Mondays: Murmurations

Greetings from Santa Fe!  My journey has begun in this beautiful place to experience and learn more about integrated medicine.

Today we were introduced to "the new science" of consciousness. This video captures the flight of starlings called murmurations. These synchronistic patterns were used to illustrate how some communication cannot be explained through traditional scientific understanding.

Some of our communication and connection to one another may be transmitted without conscious awareness.


I will be more aware of my connection to others.

Mindfulness Mondays: Develop your Facebook Filter

Facebook was launched in 2004 as a social networking site for college students.  Since that time it has expanded in scope and accessibility with 1.44 billion active users as of March 2015.

Social networking etiquette appears to be lacking for many. Users seem comfortable posting material that they might not as readily share in face to face interactions.  News events can flare up mean spirited material that triggers strong emotions and test the bounds of "friend-ship."

Develop a personal Facebook filter this week.  Browse your news-feed at a time that negativity is less likely to impact your mood. Monitor your internal response and wish safety, happiness, peace, and love to all people- regardless of their opinion.  Refrain from using social media to persuade, defend, or attack your unlike minded friends.

If your filter isn't working- consider unplugging for awhile.

This week I will be mindful of my Facebook Filter.

Mindfulness Mondays: Loving-Kindness

Mind Space Imagery of Zion National Park
 h/t Lindsay Marotta

Our mind space can get as cluttered as our desks, making positive emotions and productivity difficult.  Clear your internal space with a Loving-Kindness Meditation.

"May I be safe.
May I be happy.
May I be healthy.
May I be at peace. "

Remember to breathe.
Loving-Kindness starts with you.

This week I will gift myself with Loving-Kindness.

Mindfulness Mondays: Be G.L.A.D.

Bricktown River Walk 2015

Mindfulness guru Donald Altman developed a technique called *G.L.A.D. In quiet reflection each day consider your:
G- One gratitude
L-  One new thing you learned (google if needed)
A- One accomplishment
D- One thing of delight 

This buffalo statue from the "Spirit of the Buffalo" community art project DELIGHTED me on a recent walk downtown.


This week I will get my G.L.A.D. going.

*You may use this acronym for a journal prompt or record your G.L.A.D. on index cards.

Learn more about Oklahoma Public Art

Feelings Friday: Kubler- Ross's Guide to the Grief Journey

Grief is a personal journey that takes time.

Are we there yet?

Losing a pet evokes the same emotions as other losses and for some children it is their first experience with the finality of death.  For the past seven years Suki has been a comfort to many children as they have done their "feelings work." This month I am helping those same children understand grief as they process Suki's death. Many of my clients have dealt with loss before, but Suki is a catalyst to talk it through again.

Grief work is good work.

Dr. Elisabeth Kubler-Ross was an innovative Swiss Psychiatrist who spent over thirty years studying grief in her work with terminally ill clients and their families.  She is credited for founding the Hospice Movement and her legacy includes a reliable guide to grieving.  I first learned about Dr. Kubler-Ross when I was an undergraduate and I still use her stage model in comforting children and adults. It is a useful tool to predict feelings at an otherwise unpredictable time.

Stage One: Denial.  Even if you are prepared for a death (due to illness or aging)  there will be some times when you forget or disbelieve that your loved one is dead. Thoughts of expecting to see them in the next room or waking up and questioning if it was a bad dream are common. Numbing and a sense of unreality are the feelings within this stage.

Stage Two: Bargaining.  This stage is marked by "What if . . ." thoughts.  What if the doctors had done tests earlier, what if we hadn't gone on that trip, . . . Feelings in this stage feel muted, as if in a fog. Anger, anxiety, sadness, and confusion are present but mild.

Stage Three: Anger and Guilt. For many people this is a tricky spot.  Either they are uncomfortable with anger- so they gloss over it- or they get way too comfortable with the anger and linger too long. Anger is directed at others who might have helped more, at self for not recognizing signs or for what was undone in the relationship, or at the deceased for dying. Angry or guilty feelings are powerful and unsettling. Some people describe their feelings in this stage as "restless."  

Stage Four: Sadness and Depression. The permanence of death is intensely sad and depressing.  At this point in grieving- the reality of death is internalized and the work of surviving the loss becomes a daily work.  The sadness of grief-work has a time table that is unique to each person and is not a symptom of mental illness.  Signs of concern are extended periods of lack of interest, withdrawal, poor eating and sleep, and a wish to die. 

Stage Five: Acceptance. A grieving person is always sad about the loss. Acceptance is finding a "new normal" of living without the loved one. The turning point is in the ability to develop a different loving relationship without a physical presence, learning to live with the separation. Ultimately resolution of loss involves memorial (traditions, memories, legacy), a full range of feelings, and hope for the future.

It is not uncommon within a family to see several different stages of grief, even though they experienced the loss at the same time. We have a guide but we don't all  follow the same path and sometimes we will re-experience the stages multiple times before we arrive at acceptance.  

As I process Suki's death with my clients who have come to expect her in my office on Wednesdays, I realize that Suki continues her work as a therapy dog even now. I am hearing incredible stories of loss and we are traveling together. It is nice to have a companion on our journey.

I hope this post helps you with loss and will be a tool for you in your walk with others on the the path.

Please share the link if you find it helpful. Thank you for reading.

Feelings Friday: Thriving through challenging times

The thriving "Survivor Tree" OKC
h/t Flickr 2008

There is a big difference between surviving and thriving.  We all know people who have experienced crisis or trauma, and relive it every day.  They have survived, but their identity is consumed by the event.  Thrivers have their identity shaped by the event.  They are forever changed, but stronger.  The difference is resilience.  Resilience is a learnable skill, it is NOT a character trait.  Psychologists have been able to identify certain protective factors that all of us can develop to build the skill of resilience.

Create Support.  Having healthy and supportive networks within and outside of your family is invaluable.  The “sweet spot” of how many friends are necessary to provide buoyancy during turbulent times is unique to the individual.  Find your magic number intentionally developing, investing, and nurturing solid relationships starting today. 

Foster Flexibility.  Rigidity does not work well when change happens.  Practice being “bendy” with the little things, like scaling back on your to do list when you have a hectic day.  The more experience you have of developing a Plan B the easier it will be to transition when unwanted change (Job loss, health problem, or crisis) knocks on your door.

Practice Decisiveness. Two habits are debilitating during crisis: passivity and avoidance.  When disaster strikes, action is required.  Passivity can lead to depression, and avoidance transforms into anxiety.  Practice in   decision making and following through with action is empowering and helps you to lead yourself in uncertain times.

Find Perspective. Be realistic in evaluating current obstacles. Have you successfully resolved other challenges in the past?  Is there reason to believe that circumstances can improve?  Seeking hopefulness within a crisis is well worth the effort.  Realism and resilience are great partners in recovery.

I am continually inspired by the stories I hear every day in my work as a psychologist.  Thrivers use their existing resources and develop new skills to navigate through the hard times and come out ahead. Work on your ability to thrive- watch your resilience grow!

"The world breaks everyone, and afterward, some are strong at the broken places."

Ernest Hemingway

Mindfulness Monday: Memorials

Memorial Iris Garden
St. John the Baptist Edmond, OK 2015

Twenty years ago many lives were lost to terrorism in Oklahoma. We mourned and bonded in the community effort to recover.

Throughout our state there are memorials to this shared history.  Memorials are important because they invite us to stop and reflect on the people and experiences that shape us into who we are today.

"We cannot tell what may happen to us.. But we can decide what happens in us... How we can take it, what we can do with it .. and that is what really counts in the end."     Joseph Fort Newton

This week I will take time to reflect on the people and experiences that have shaped me into the person I am today.

Feelings Friday: Autism All Star

h/t Foodarts "The Cattle Whisperer"

Temple Grandin is an extra-ordinary woman. She is a professor at Colorado State University, an inventor, author of several books, consultant to livestock companies for the humane treatment of cattle, activist, and was named among the "Top 100" most influential people by Times Magazine in 2010.

As a neuro-diverse person on the Autism Spectrum, Temple Grandin is also a powerful ASD advocate demonstrating the truism: The world needs all kinds of minds

Dr. Grandin does an outstanding job expressing how ASD symptoms influence her thinking and shape her life's work.  Please set aside time (twenty minutes) to listen to her Ted Talk from 2010 as part of your autism education in April. Consider sharing this post with anyone you think could benefit from Dr. Grandin's wise words.

 
To learn more about Temple Grandin follow this link.

Mindfulness Mondays: Mind Wandering

h/t Lindsay Marotta 2015 
Autism Awareness Light it Up Blue Sunset

Would it surprise you to know we have between 25 to 125 thoughts per SECOND? By sunset we average 70,000 thoughts per day.  That is a LOT of THOUGHTS!

How many of these thoughts are habitual?  How many are even accurate? Yet this stream of internal chatter continues throughout the day. 

Labeling disruptive thought as "mind wandering"allows us to redirect our thoughts to the present moment.  This helps us to focus better at work, in relationships. 

This week I will label my "mind wandering" and return my focus to the present moment.

Marotta meets Kondo: The Language of Change

Before Marie Kondo February 2015

What could a 53 year old psychologist from Oklahoma and a 30 something professional organizer from Japan have in common?  We speak the same language.  The language of change.  Marie Kondo is empowering people to transform life through clearing physical clutter – my spin is to shift perspective  by letting go of thoughts, beliefs, and behaviors that no longer serve us.

Marotta and Kondo are both aware that incredible change is possible when you have the right tools.  But you have to be willing to do the work.

Kondo’s book The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up came at an opportune time as I find myself somewhere between “emptying” and “feathering” my nest.  She struck a chord when she detailed that the point of tidying was not to be measured by how much you throw away, but instead to intentionally surround yourself with the things you love. With this bliss in mind I began to apply her method to my clothes, which is where she recommends that we start.

It was the perfect rainy weekend.  Step One I gathered ALL of my clothing into our guest bedroom.  Kondo urges her organizing clients (now readers) to gather all of the items in a specific category together to complete the project all at once.  If there is a clothing item that is missed in this broad sweep (think closets, laundry room, hooks, etc) of your home it is supposed to be given away.  I am not brave enough to show you the picture of the heaps of garments that overtook the guestroom. The excess, mistakes, waste and multiple sizes that made up my clothing choices from past to present were all sprawled out.

Step Two involved holding each item in my hand and evaluating if it “sparked joy.”It was oddly reassuring to check my gut for an opinion.

Many of my clothing decisions were outdated, they literally no longer suit me.  For years these choices took up space in my closet, unseen, but definitely felt as I tried to hang up new purchases.  At the end of the day . . . four bags of clothing to donate to charity and two brimming trash bags of torn, worn, and stained flotsam.

A strong theme throughout Marie Kondo’s guide to zen organizing is the energy you will derive from thorough tidying.  Her cultural perspective of energy is fun to think about.  According to her philosophy all items have energy.  When you surround yourself with items that bring you joy, you are energized and happier in your space.  When your space is filled with items that no longer spark that loving feeling you are drained of energy.  I waited for the energy after completely revamping my clothing category.  Instead I felt exhausted.  It was harder than I thought.  In the back of my mind I worried that I had “let go” of something that I loved, or that I might need someday. The parallel to therapeutic change was glaring.

It has been two months since I began my magical tidying.  My wardrobe pallet is completely changed, dressing is simpler, and I love every single thing I wear.  I’m feeling the energy now.

After my clothing category I tackled my bathrooms, and my true nemesis: paper.  The before and after pictures tell only half of the story. The mind shift towards simplicity is even more impressive.

After Marie Kondo February 2015

Zen Organizing a la Kondo 2/2015

My response to empty nest is still evolving, but focusing on what remains instead of what has been lost is a delightful blend of peacefulness and excitement. If you are facing a life change I would strongly recommend the orderly advice of Marie Kondo. Let your external space reflect your internal change.

It is a language we can all benefit from at various points of our journey. 

Happy Tidying!  

5 Steps to becoming an Active Bystander

h/t Dial B for Blog

Do you remember Horton?  He was the elephant in the Classic Dr. Seuss book Horton Hears a Who.  Horton showed moral courage and persistence in “doing the right thing” even though he faced social pressure.   While others teased, taunted, and mocked his beliefs Horton continued to repeat “A person is a person . . .”

On Monday March 9^th, the news of a date party bus from the University of Oklahoma singing a racially charged song was released to the media.  People were outraged, every national and local news station covered the story and replayed the video.   There are thousands of Facebook comments about the moral character of these students, some are questioning the Greek System, and others are accusing parents. “They were all singing along” suggests that every student approved of what was going on.

I believe there were passive Hortons on the bus that night. I believe some of the young people silently cringed at the lyrics and sentiment that targeted a group of people, but no one spoke up. If your student was on the bus would he/she have said something?

Social psychology has the answer and you might not like it.  While the origins of this bigoted song is unclear, the reason why many on the bus were singing and others did nothing to stop the behavior is well documented.  It is called the Bystander Effect. Essentially there was a new social norm formulated on that bus, and each individual student felt personally ineffective in doing the right thing.

There is no such thing as an innocent bystander, and we need to be intentional in teaching how to stand up for what is right.  In study after study, the more witnesses that are present and do nothing- the less likely it is that one person will help.  It is a combination of group behavior, and individual psychology. The research interest about bystanders began in Queens, New York in 1964.  While 35 neighbors watched from their apartment windows a young woman was repeatedly stabbed and sexually assaulted.  One person eventually called 911 but it was too late.

The University of Oklahoma date party is not an Oklahoma problem, the Kitty Genovese murder was not a New York problem.The Bystander Effect is a global social problem and we must understand it to make a difference.

We all want to think that we would “do the right thing.” But bystander studies have been conducted regularly with various groups of people in multiple settings since the mid-sixties and the result is the same.  As individuals we lack moral courage as an instinct when we are surrounded by group apathy or aggression.  There is a diffusion of responsibility in crowd behavior that inhibits individual moral ethics.

Social Psychology also offers a solution: Active Bystanding.  Horton was an active bystander in his defense of the Who’s. It is a trainable skill. Beginning with the knowledge that we feel instinctively passive in crowds- we can resist the instinct. Here is how to be a Horton:

1.   Recognize the uncomfortable feeling you have in your gut when something “feels wrong” to you personally.
2.   Define the problem (I do not agree with this behavior- this song is racist and inappropriate)- You are affirming your own feeling.
3.  Seek out at least one other person who is in the crowd who is not actively participating.
4. Ask that person if they are offended or uncomfortable and enlist their support. (“This feels wrong to me.  Are you uncomfortable too?) You are gathering moral courage in partnering with someone else .
5.  Do the next right thing. Together you can begin to develop a plan.

A passive bystander tries to ignore or sooth the uncomfortable feelings in one of two ways.  Passive bystanding focuses on the potential negative consequences (social, emotional, and possibly physical) of going “against the group” or they rationalize that since they are not participating they are blameless. These strategies reduce the stress of feeling powerless.

Active bystanding is not natural, but it also isn't really complicated.  Right now you feel a strong “gut” reaction to seeing the video.  Log this outrage for later use. You and your kids/student will be tested ethically at some point in the future.  You will be at a choice point to go with your gut- and go against the crowd or to be passive and feel guilty and later ashamed.

Be proud of yourself.  Be a Horton.

Remember this: The combined act of checking with your internal compass and then expressing out loud even quietly to one other person shifts the bystander effect from passive “I can’t do anything about this” to active “let’s do something."

Let’s make good come from bad.

Want to learn more about active bystanding? Check out the U Matter at U Mass website.

Mindfulness Mondays: Moment by Moment

Lake Tenkiller 2014

Have you had the experience of driving somewhere and feeling uncertain of how you got there because your mind was on so many things at once?  The habit of multitasking creates layers and layers of thinking that can result in a brain fog.

The practice of mindfulness acts like a "mental Fabreeze" to clear your thinking and help you engage in life moment by moment.

After all, this moment is the only moment that is guaranteed.




I WILL LIVE MY LIFE- MOMENT BY MOMENT.